Loving Her.

Choosing to love her is like willing to jump off the ledge
You could be hurt or you could be happy
But don’t you know she might be worth the risk
You still haven’t dig deep in
There you’ll find her soft heart
Hidden under a hard shell
Those who truly love her would only see.

Actions And Words.

He saw her cry
So he gave her an unexpected hug
That’s when he realizes he likes her
But she was doubtful
And full of questions
Yet, he didn’t tell her
And she didn’t asked either
So it’s just silence between them
Because actions also require words to hear
But where are they?

The Desert Safari Experience.

January 6, 2017. The day I had to miss work because of an adventure awaiting for me. I had to do a lie which I am sick just to be able to go there. But well that’s halfway true because I had really these muscle pains and light fever.

2017 would be the year for adventures. So I had to take a chance and gladly it turned up well. Desert Safari is one of the places on my go to list in Dubai.

So this how the opportunity started. One day, my sister said they’re going to Safari and of course it’s a Friday ‘cause it’s their day offs. (I had my day offs on Wednesdays, cannot be on Fridays, Sales kinda thing.) Well at first I hesitated due to I had work that day but really I badly want to go there. I don’t even know when this chance will come up again, so I asked when and because I still didn’t have an absent and I can’t even change my day off either. I choose to skip work and started thinking and planning about the reasons I would do. An emergency or I am sick kinda thing. One, two, three days past, then that week came. One day before the adventure, I was silent at work, feeling slightly unwell because I can’t help thinking that day that I will be working while they’re around there so happy. And I’m also feeling the muscle pains, so I stay still, not actively talking with them. Low energy with countable number of smile. Gladly things turn out well, there I am sick. Pretending to be but really feeling a little unwell.

At 10 in the evening our shift finished, we took the bus and metro train going home. It was windy that night, I don’t have any overcoat. Me and my colleague parted in the metro train interchange. Without my workmate within my sight, I started doing my next step, messaging my boss and colleagues I’m sick and can’t work for the next day. And that’s where the plan ended and there I am finally missing some work.

The next day I woke up late and feeling slightly unwell. I started the day by eating breakfast and taking some medicine to keep me up for the day. Then I packed my bag and bathed.

The service for the tour came at around 2. I was all giddy wearing my Taylor Swift inspired Ootd composed of muscle tee, skirt and sneakers. I was very excited to take a lot of pictures. We were fetched by a Toyota land cruiser that can accommodate eight people including the driver. We were five and there were another two which came with us. I was seated at the back with my sister and her friend. Thanks that we are all Filipino except the driver which is an Arabian. But well it’s better. When all of us are already fetched, we traveled going to the desert which took more than an hour.

First activity for the day was Dune bashing. For an easier and safer drive, some air is gotten out of the tires. The Safari ride take place in some desert near Sharjah. I think it’s the boundary somewhere between Dubai and Oman. The dune bashing experience was like riding in a rollercoaster. It was super fun and a bouncy ride that seatbelt is a must wear. It was kinda hard to take videos. It turned out shaky and you can hear some of our screams. I also took some pictures. It lasted for about 15 minutes.

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After that, we stopped some place in the desert to take some photos. Our car stop somewhere high in the middle of the desert that you’ll be afraid you might roll over. But we still managed to take some selfies and group pictures too. When finished taking pictures, we rode the land cruiser again and went to the location of the other activities where we spent the remaining hours. There we had our seat for dinner near the stage. The dinner was to be served at 6:30 pm and because we’re still early to arrive we take a look around the place.

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Upon looking around the place, we found the camel riding area. There we rode a camel. At first, I thought it was frightening but no it wasn’t. The camel ride was too short that I wanted to ride it again. But well, give way for others. After that, we took some pictures in the sand dunes. There were also some quad bikes that you can ride but with an additional fee. There was also the free henna section for ladies that can stay for weeks on the skin. I didn’t get one because it will leave a mark and only be applied on the hands. (I’m sad for that one, it’s for skipping work reasons, they might know.) There was also a section where you can try the Arabic clothes, Abaya for female and Kandura for male. We didn’t try this for hygienic condition; many people may have worn it.

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When we’re finished touring around the place. We went back to our seats and because it’s still a little bit early for dinner, we ate some of the snacks we brought. While waiting for the food, there’s a section for some free coffee and tea. After a few minutes, it was announced that the food is ready to be served. The starter includes Shawarma, Samosa, and Falafel. Heavy meal is composed of vegetarian and non vegetarian. There were a lot of different salads, such as Green salad, Tabbouleh and many others. There’s also the Biryani and white rice. I was also surprised to see that they had Spaghetti. There’s also some Kebab and Chicken Tikka. Of all these foods I like Chicken Tikka the most. For dessert, there’s Baklava and some apple and orange slices. For the beverage, there’s unlimited water and soft drinks. One of my companion said that the alcohol was free to drink there but we didn’t try it for we need to enjoy the night. I also saw the Shisha getting passed on; I don’t have interest in trying it.

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While we were eating there’s a show ongoing. There was the Belly dance, Fire dance and Tanoura dance show. There was also a man carrying a bird around the place where you can take a picture with by paying a minimal amount. For the souvenir, there’s a section where you can get a customized sand bottle. There’s also a photographer who took photos around. I had the picture taken in the dinner seats and also the one while riding the camel as a memorabilia. All night I just took pictures and videos. And eat as much I can, more on the snacks we brought because I don’t like the Arabic food that much.

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The activity ended at about 9 in the evening. Before going home we were given some dates to munch on. For the vehicle to ride going home, we changed to another one where the only five of us left, the other two we’re with rode in another car. On the way out in the middle of the desert, we suddenly got stalled in the sand and I thought we’re gonna spend the rest of the night there. I was slightly nervous for it, thankful we didn’t for we have work the next day but it took about 30 minutes to get the vehicle out. The driver said it really happen sometimes. Traveling the way home, it was still a little bumpy but I didn’t wear my seatbelt and just hold on to the car handles for I know there was no more dune bashing then suddenly I bounced off my seat and knock my head on the vehicle roof and to my tour companion. I immediately grabbed the nearest seatbelt I can get hold of just to save my life. I was seated at the back for we are only five excluding the driver. One on the front, two in the middle and another two in the back. Well, that’s what really adventure is but damn it hurt. I was afraid I can’t wake up if I fall asleep but the drive was long and the day is tiring, I beat myself to sleep.

Our driver escorted us to the building we lived. We arrived there at about 10. And because it’s still early with some energy left, we went to the nearest mall to buy some food and cake for my brother for it’s his birthday the next day. I also grabbed some ice cream because I just feel like to.

That day ended so well and I was really happy I won’t regret skipping work. Even there’s work the other day and I woke up to stiff arms and heavy body it was something worth it. It was such a great experience that I can finally tick off on my places to go list.

Until to my next adventure. Bye.

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The Feeling.

Have you ever missed that feeling of butterflies in your stomach? That feeling you wished you could fly? That feeling where everything is fine and dandy? Well, I missed that feeling. Smiling, randomly looking some kind of idiot just because you’ve thought of someone. How their body next to you was like? How it felt when your skin touched? How to be wrapped up in their arms? The warmth of them radiating? How their hand fits perfectly with yours? It’s ridiculous but also a comfortable feeling. The feeling of falling in love with somebody and the most fun part of it was also them being in love with you. But sadly, he still doesn’t exist in my life. I think he’s still lost in some part of the world. Maybe stuck in there. Just kidding. Well, if ever he came sometime I would be glad to welcome him with my open arms. So wherever you are or whoever you are, I’m right here making myself the best for you.

Poetry, My Companion.

I was alone
Then there were the words
So I write
The poetries and paragraphs
Written in the pages
Became my dear friends
Then one day
I met silence
Pain and fear
So I learned to shut up
And live with them inside me.

The Games.

There you are with your freak smile
I can’t tell whether it’s good or bad
But here I am in your games
Betting
I play I will play
So fun
Was love is really like this about?
Stolen kisses
Surprised back hugs
I with the sweet smile
Mind racing
I knew the dare
I will win this game
With your broken heart and not mine.

*For f*ckboys out there, how dare you play with me. I know your games. I can tell.

Play.

I’m your crush
But where’s your girlfriend?
I know she’s there
No clue about your doing
Hey boy
Need some fun?
Games to play?
I’m on
Will make you thirst for me
‘Cause you’ve been a really bad boy
Let you taste the truth of life
Not all you want could be yours
I know you’re bored
But here’s my warning, f*ckboy.

*Because I’m tired of these guys called f*ckboys who messes with life. Hating them. Smh.

Too Sweet.

Dear darling, hugs and kisses were plain sweet
Sugarcoated words too much to take
I’m covered in honey so drunk in it
But be careful I might be fed up
And find the taste of bittersweet in it.

You smell just like vanilla
You taste like buttercream
You’re filling up my senses
With empty calories
I feel like I’m just missing
Something whenever you leave
We’ve got all the ingredients
Except you needing me
So respectfully.
-Cake, Melanie Martinez

To My Almost.

As the leaves of the past year slowly fall one by one into an end, there I was letting you go and this 2017 if ever we occur to met, I hope that will be a new story for us like we’re some random strangers meeting for the first time.

2016. The year I truly lost you. Through the days and months I feel like I was gripping by the edge but can’t finally go. Lingering every second that your name will randomly pop up in my phone. Then one day, you did. But I think that was some kind of domino reaction I’ve done. There was a time where I missed you so badly I wanted to talk but I didn’t had enough courage to do so. So I told my college classmate who we both knew to say hello to you and gather some information. And she did because she knew I like you. There were your long conversations where she sent to me. There you talk a little about me. And maybe that’s the reason you decided to be noticed again by commenting on one of my previous post in a social network. I wake up to that notification and had this nervous and curious smile on my face. So I comment back at it, conquered my fear and personally messaged you. I waited for hours for your respond. They never came. My mind started to fill with questions. Why did you do it if you don’t have any intention of talking back? Why did I really did something wrong? Do my guts really tell the truth that you like me as I like you but I ended up hurting you so you had to hurt me back? Are you angry? Or I was just making up these scenarios in my mind? I get mad at you. Why did I let one’s hello shatter me in a million pieces again? I was getting used to it again just thinking maybe you’re just too busy. Then there came the day your name appeared. I read it there were your ‘hahahaha’s’ which I didn’t know if real. Maybe you just had to reply like a requirement. I replied to that with sort of sarcastic words because truly I was still sort of mad and I don’t feel like talking anymore but I had to ‘cause I want to try talking normally again. But I guess that was a wrong move, ‘cause the months past and you never even try to read that message. I hate it. And I realized I can never ever fix the gap so what’s the point of it. The wounds were to heal opened once again and it was some mistake of approaching you.

But you know what even I’m hating you, I still want to remember that you became part of my life, I don’t want to forget ‘cause you’re one of the sweetest thing that happened in my life, it may become bittersweet in the end at least I’ve got the chance to know you. It’s hard to say the final goodbye but maybe things could really be better this way. I need to go back to my normal self. Do things I always fond of doing. They do remind me of you ‘cause we had like this invisible string that made us meet each other, you are me and I am you, and I will never forget I considered you my soul mate ‘cause you’re the boy version of me. The similar likes, interests, zodiac signs, it’s funny you know. It was good memories.

Sad to say, I had to move further without you. Leave the feeling behind and start anew. I had to love myself if I want someone to love me wholeheartedly. Goodbye and I hope this would be my last words for you. You were my almost.

And I just wanna tell you
It takes everything in me not to call you.
And I wish I could run to you.
And I hope you know that every time I don’t
I almost do,
I almost do.
-I Almost Do, Taylor Swift